Your are not alone! most of parents come across challenges disciplining their kids. I was one of them too. I used to read articles, do researches to find ways to make my kids more cooperative and easier to manage. Nothing really worked with lack of consistency and understanding the root of the problem. I finally found a parenting course that helped me raise my kids with no yelling at all. Here is some tools of what I learned:
Understanding why kids don’t listen
I was shocked by the fact that the kids behaviour of being difficult comes from the need of attention. It was heart breaking knowing that my kids needed me more than I thought, and behaving in a bad way was to seek attention and belonging.
Spend more quality time with your kids
This is the first thing to consider when you see your kids not listening, talking back and refusing to corporate. Think of how much time you spend with them in a daily basis. From work, to laundry to cleaning and cooking, by the end of the day you are exhausted and have no time for the kids.
Increase your kids self-confidence
The lack of confidence also makes kids unsure of their emotions and reactions. Try to boost your kids self-confidence with encouragement. Some encouragement daily practices that most parents think are goo, are actually wrong and can outcome negative results. Encouragement can be done by giving age suitable responsibilities that make the kid feel powerful and contributing within the family in a positive way.
Get off the battlefield as soon as you can
When your kids; toddlers to teenagers fight back when you ask them to tidy up their toys, clean up their room or stop playing video games because dinner is ready, and you find yourself in a back and forth conversation that ends with screaming and yelling, you lose the battle because you end up being the bad guy and the kids do what they were asked to do ONLY when you become the bad guy. That is absolutely not healthy at all and that’s not what you want to be. Try to flea the scene when you give orders, say it once and that’s it. Let her know that she can join the family for dinner when she cleans up her room, also tell him he can join for dinner when he stops the video games.
Avoid the Time-Out Practice
I was one of the parents who used time out in a daily basis thinking that is the best practice to discipline my little one. Did it ever work? Never!
The idea of time-out is a soft of punishment to let the kids know they did something wrong and they should listen next time. All I get from my son after this is more resistance and fighting back. Punishing the kids makes them feel intimidated and the parent in their eyes is the bad guy again.
Do not reward your kid for doing good
When our kids surprisingly listen to us, we get so exited and think that if we reward them they will keep listening and doing what we ask them to do all the time. Actually, kids love treats too but they tend to please us ONLY to get that candy, ice cream, star sticker or compliment. They also tend to stop doing the good thing that pleases us because the reward is never appealing to them. Instead, you give rewards from time to time, no harm in that but it’s way better to encourage the kids to do the good stuff because they like to do it. Let them be inspired by the task itself not the prize.
These 6 tips are a few of what the parenting course provides. I encourage you to invest in your family’s future and take the course that is rich of practical and realistic tools that help you and your family grow and live in a positive environment and build a great relationship with one another. Whether you are expecting, a mother of a toddler, a school age kid a teenager or early adult, this course is structured for you. Just like I enjoyed it and enjoyed more seeing my kids turning from resisting, difficult to disciplined, responsible and contributing, I’m sure you will enjoy your happy family journey as well.
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